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Lust for Loneliness

from Grid Hymns by Infinitefreefall

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quiet and numb and too tired to run
i feel at peace when i just make myself small
all of the maybes are disintegrating
i feel at peace when i don't feel anything at all

"i swear i can change"
i know myself too well to find any truth in these claims
to keep playing these games it's useless i say

"i swear i can change"
but burn the skin off my bones and the blood out my veins
and the lead in my brain and i'll still be the same

and i'll tell you right now
think i'd rather be alone
i'm tired of the strife
so feel free to let me go

and i'll tell you right now
i'd just kill to be alone
everybody leaves
and everybody knows

and when the pressure becomes too much
and when the voices get too loud
i walk the width of the pacific and i try not to drown

cause as compelling as that sounds
i've got to sell out and go mainstream
cause i've never been so sure everyone i know secretly hates me

so i'll know no one at all
i think it's better this way
you know where to find me
if you have something you need to say
don't worry about me too much
i'm barely alive anyway


from Grid Hymns, released November 15, 2016


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Infinitefreefall Charleston, South Carolina

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